Die Another Day

So... I thought that I was going to spend this movie going on a binge of James Bond movies from the 60s, probably going through the first era of Connery and maybe checking out this George Lazenby and what he did... instead I went from Goldfinger to the James Bond film that arguably killed Pierce Brosnan's career as James Bond.

I don't know what my deal is with Pierce Brosnan these days, I just feel like I've watched a lot of his crap recently. Whether its his attempt at an action revival in The November Man, or... whatever Survivor was. I'm actually really wondering whether or not I'm going to end up watching Mamma Mia at some point just to prove to myself that Pierce isn't that good. Because dammit, for some reason I want him to be.

Die Another Day picks up with MI6's leading misognist drunk James Bond, played by Pierce Brosnan for his fourth and last appearance.

After a mission in North Korea goes wrong, James is taken captive and tortured. When he is finally released, he is exchanged for a North Korean terrorist played by Rick Yune (who was having a few short good years in big franchise films like this and Fast and Furious). 007 is no longer trusted by MI6 because they believe he gave away secrets to the North Koreans.

Bond goes rogue to track down Zhao and figure out who betrayed him.

In essence, this should have been a pretty personal tale. I've figured out that that's what have made the Daniel Craig Bond very good. It started with Casino Royale and his relationship with Eva Green's character and it only continues throughout.

And while this movie should have been a personal tale of Bond's path to redemption or his adventure of revenge against those who betrayed him...

Now, the first half of the movie, is actually kind of entertaining. A lot if it is Bond doing his thing without the help of MI6. While the movie didn't focus on anything personal with James, it did do a good job at doing the sort of rogue agent working to redeem himself trope pretty well. And I think if the movie had stayed that way, having Bond work outside the law, it would have been a decent movie.

But instead, they decided to introduce Bond to Jynx...

Now sometimes, like in the case of Sean Penn, like I said in my review of The Gunman, you just believe someone is a good actor because of what has been said about them in the past. Sometimes you've never seen someone in a good movie but you know that they do have a good movie somewhere in their repertoire. But while I've seen at least one of Sean Penn's movies... I have never seen Halle Berry act well in a movie. I've seen her in good movies like the X-men movies, but I've never seen a movie that I was wowed by the performance of Halle Berry. I've seen Catwoman for Pete's sake!

Halle Berry plays a CIA agent named Jynx. And my god, I know the Bond franchise is known for its catchphrases and one-liners, but hers are really, really bad. Its like they wanted really bad to write in a black character for James Bond, but they just took it to a level that was not only bad, it was almost offensive. And the worst part is, Halle Berry just went along with it. And it just kind of proves that whole theory about when people win Oscars they go off and do a couple bad films after, like Eddie Redmayne with Jupiter Ascending after Theory of Everything.

I mean don't get me wrong, Halle Berry isn't a bad choice for an attractive Bond girl. Acting-wise though, she's just really awful.

Which makes me really regret the fact that they had her as the main Bond girl and not the alternative.

Rosamund freaking Pike.

Yes, before Gone Girl, before Jack Reacher, in her first motion picture role, Rosamund Pike played Miranda Frost. And she is really arguably the best part of the movie. Its funny because people usually forget this role because the movie panned, but I always remembered Rosamund Pike as that incredibly hot girl from Die Another Day. And I think she could have been an awesome main Bond girl... but it was just a different time. She was way too unknown and at the time, in comparison with Halle Berry, unfortunately future crazy girl from Gone Girl loses.

And again, this movie could have been a lot better if a couple things had gone differently, but apart from the fact that they chose the wrong woman to be the main Bond girl, they moved the movie from the realism of Cuba and London... to Iceland in an Ice Palace.

I am no joking, the movie suddenly moves to a giant Ice Castle as the main set piece. And don't get me wrong, it was kind of cool, when I first saw it. But the more and more I watched the action unfold, the hokeyness only become more hokey, and Halle Berry just keep on showing up, this movie started reminding me more and more of a movie I remember having a huge emphasis on Ice than it probably should have.

Yes, in many ways, Die Another Day was the Batman and Robin of the James Bond franchise. A movie that had a villain with a name relating to ice, the last of a franchise that caused a more gritty and darker reboot. Yeah... Die Another Day is the Batman and Robin of the Bond movies.

Now I don't think its nearly as bad as Batman and Robin, and I would even say its not nearly as bad as people say it is. However, what makes this movie so bad?

Well like I said before, I think a lot of it had to do with the fact that the movie, as much as it was called James Bond, it didn't focus on James Bond. He was just the vehicle as this wacky plot decided to go even more hokey and ridiculous. So I don't exactly blame Pierce Brosnan. I think he did exactly what he was picked to be Bond for. But it was manly what surrounded him that hurt this movie. It was the plot, mainly surrounding on a random satellite weapon, something that was already done in an earlier Brosnan Bond movie, and an evil plot to bring North Korea and South Korea to war.

Another thing that became a huge issue in this movie was the use of too many gadgets and putting more emphasis on those crazy gadgets as opposed to an actual story.

While I will admit, some of the gadgets were pretty cool, eventually it just got too ridiculous and almost made the movie a parody of itself as opposed to something taken seriously.

But on top of all of that, there was a point in this movie where I realized why this movie failed.

James Bond has always, first and foremost, been a movie about spies. Its a spy thriller. Yes, its beginning were always hokey and a little bit ridiculous, (I mean you all read my issues with Goldfinger), but they never felt so ridiculous that the movie felt Science fiction instead of a spy thriller.

Well when you're villains are walking around in long trench coats like the ones you would see in the Matrix, and also dressed like this to the right, you have to take a step back and ask, is this movie a James Bond movie, or a weird Science fiction thing.

And yes, James Bond has delved into a sort of Science fiction, having evil masterminds who want to take over the world have those qualities about them, but for some reason Die Another Day went to a whole new level, dare I say, the Schumacher level.

But this feeling of Science fiction didn't really dawn on me until the very end. Jynx and Bond are trying to escape a crashing plane. They're in a helicopter, fake looking sparks are flying everywhere, people are flying out of the plane like horrible special effects, and Halle Berry is throwing horrible puns left and right. And I just thought to myself, My god, this reminds me of a bad Sci Fi Channel movie... until I realized, I was watching this movie on the Sci Fi Channel.

And there it is, if you're looking for 60s weirdness, go for Goldfinger. If you're looking for Gritty and dark, go for Casino Royale. If you're looking for a Sci Fi original movie, go for Die Another Day.

But those are my thoughts on Die Another Day. I don't hate it as much as I think some people do, but it definitely is one of the silliest James Bond films. But what do you think? Comment and Discuss below! You can also send me your thoughts on Twitter @cmhaugen24. You can also send me your requests for future movies I should review. If you follow me on Twitter, you can get updates on future movie news and reviews, as well as possibly see live tweets of certain movies that I watch.

I'll leave you with this. I wanted to put on a trailer of Pierce Brosnan cut into the Spectre trailer, and I'll leave that here, but it wouldn't let me put it up as a video, which is sad. I had a little bit of trouble actually finding a video I could post so here's the Sam Smith music video for Spectre. Enjoy!

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